What was I going to do My mom was going to freak out on me. Oh no! Not my Dad, he is going to kill me. I have no idea what I am going to do Who is going to be there for me and help me get through all this. At this point I had no idea what to do. I sat in my room crying and praying to God to get me through all of this and give me courage to tell someone what was going on. Tina, I barely said crying to my sister as she answered her cell phone. Whats wrong My sister replied.
Tina… I need to talk to you please help me… Im scared, I said hysterically crying. Why Maria What is going on Where are you she asked in bothered manner. Im here at home. Please dont be mad at me, I need you, I said barely even enunciating my words. Maria, I need you to calm down, hon tell me whats going on, she said in a soothing concerned voice. Tina, I said with tears pouring out my eyes. I found out that. well Im pregnant. Oh honey, are you sure Ill make a doctors appointment for sure, but until we know for ure dont say anything.
So calm down and Ill call you later. I love you, Tina told me. I love you too! Thanks. I said with a new feeling of comfort. I know my sister would be there for me, but I was astonished in how understanding she was about this. She went with me to the doctor and when we found out that I was ten week into my pregnancy. She talked to me about all the options. It was clear to me that it would be hard to have a baby so young, but I knew I had to keep my angel, I would have to face the consequences of my actions.
The next two weeks were the longest weeks of my life knowing in seven months I would be having my own little angel. Right then I knew I had to change my life. I tried to get back in the jest of things at school but there was no way I could pass with all that I had missed. So I started working and saving money, but as things started to go straight and I got my head back on my shoulders, I had a miscarriage. I cried in pain because my baby was gone and I couldnt do anything to get my angel back.
Maybe it was for the best because God knows what hes doing. That was my wake up call, to start over get things straight for my own good. Im in my senior year doing everything I can do to succeed. Working as hard as I need to, in order to get in a University and be successful, not for just me but for my angel that will come back later in my life when Im more ready and prepared. I have no regrets, because my trust is in God, and I respect His decision. So now I need to do my part and Im willing to work as hard as I need to, to be what I need to be.
Its crazy to think that I probably wouldnt even be in school writing this because I would be having a baby any day now. I wonder why this had to happen to me, and when I think about it I just want to cry because a part of me has died. Although, Im also relieved, because I know God did this to open my eyes and make me turn my life around. Now Im working as hard as I can to make my dreams of going to college and being successful come true, not for any body else, but myself and my little angel.